How Much Can One Person Take?

I've decided I may be near my breaking point. I should check myself into an insane asylum. That is where I belong at this point in my life. I feel like the world is crumbling in on top of me. The weight of these financial, emotional, and physical burdens is about to crush me.

I sit at home every day, avoiding the bill collectors phone calls. The phone rings, for a second, I think to myself...someone thought enough about me to pick up the phone and dial my number today. Then, I realize it is an 800 number, collections agent, local hospital, all attempting to squeeze blood out of a turnip as they say. Last week, the cable company came out twice (apparently to make a repair), but we intermittently checked the cable and telephone to see if they had disconnected it yet. Now, we're left with nothing to buy groceries with for a week and a half. My kids are so bored at home, they beg for a happy meal...sorry baby, mommy can't afford a happy meal today. They beg to buy a toy from the dollar tree... sorry baby, mommy can't afford any toys today. I'm on my last shot (which are over $1000 monthly, but thankfully only a $40 deductible for me!), there's only $10 in the bank for another week...what do I do? I either risk a miscarriage with our precious daughter or find some way to milk the turnip.

I feel so alone. I feel like I have nothing to look forward to when I wake up each morning. Of course, I have my precious children, but I have nothing to give them. No fun life, no trips to chuck e cheese, or the jumpy place, or lunch at McDonald's. No drive to the park because we have no gas and mommy is too big and fat and lazy to keep up with you. I sit here alone, no friends, no family, no nothing but me and my kids (who often tell me they want a new mommy).

So, here's to me and my pitty party today! Maybe I'll get over it soon, or find a real hole big enough to crawl in!